A Sunday Idea

A Sunday Idea

“The rush and pressures of modern life are a form, perhaps the most common form, of contemporary violence. To allow oneself to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit oneself to too many projects, to want to help everyone in everything is to succumb to violence.”                        —Thomas Merton

Pretty strong words.Young handsome man working

Have you ever thought of busyness in terms of violence? I have. Many violent things happen both silently and insidiously.

200px-Future_shock

Was Toffler right?

Back in 1970, Random House released Alvin Toffler’s book, Future Shock. I remember it well though I was only fifteen. Toffler maintained that the pace of life was increasing exponentially, bringing “too much change in too short a period of time.” The psychological results of stress and anxiety would be profound. The book sold over 6 million copies. A documentary film followed in 1972 with Orson Welles as the on-screen narrator.

Does your To Do List feel overwhelming?

Do you have information overload every time you tune in the news?

Do emails and social media feel like a constant barrage?

Is multi-tasking the new normal?

Do you lay awake at night thinking too much?

How have we handled the stress of “future shock” over the last 44 years?

I recently watched a science show on the NTGEO channel called, The Numbers Game. The episode was called “Could You Be A Better Boss.” One experiment referenced Navy SEAL training and examined the ability to focus under stress. Participants were shown two similar pictures that differed in small details. At first, it seemed easy to differentiate.

Then stressful distractions were added. Continue reading

Subterranean Anger

Subterranean Anger

“I’m nice, but a little bit mean today,” my granddaughter said. In her own way, she was saying that she felt angry.  Laney is two-and-a-half.

Laney with kitty face“It’s okay to feel mad,” I said, stroking her bangs to one side. I reminded her that I felt mad at our dog for not coming when called.  “It’s just not okay to be mean,” I explained, “but you can be mad.” I wondered if she could understand the distinction.

Many years ago, when I was young, I decided to be the good child. Maybe I saw certain advantages in it. My sister had a bolder personality and got in trouble some.

I was a quieter soul, an observer.

I remember being given a small necklace. It had a white marble pendant with a gold band around its center. In fine script, The Golden Rule was engraved on the band. The simple ethical code made a profound impression on me.

Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you.

My family in 1962

My family in 1962

In some ways, trying to be good was connected to a deep love for my father. My dad was and is a safe, wise, and approachable man, and I was quite sure that he’d love me no matter what. Still, being compliant is often about winning approval.

I tried to do everything “right,” but I wasn’t perfect. I had a bit of gumption and remember getting spanked.

You, got spanked?” My husband goaded. “What for?Continue reading